♥ Whatever It Takes

A strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn't even know
Now there's a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes

She said "If we're gonna make this work
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts
Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"
She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
And give me a break
I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better

But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I'd be lost without you and never find myself
Let's hold onto each other above everything else
Start over, start over

♥ by Bob Marley

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There's never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.

♥ Tsubasa Chronicles

Even if I lose this feeling,
I'm sure that
I'll just fall in love you all over again..

~ from Syaoran to Sakura ~

♥ Memory Lane

while sitting in front of my laptop and listening to music i remember this senario i had with my cousin, Cecil. this happened when i was still in Qatar and i was still new to the place. since our work hours were different from each other and our work place were somewhat about 20-30 minutes walk from each other then i had to go home by myself (only noons) and sometimes the driver can't drop me home. she told me that we're gonna walk around with my other cousin Mark so that i won't get lost and i have to remember the landmarks. so yeah, we did walk around.. went to a nearby supermarket.. ate dinner and other stuff.. well, i was like looking around and trying to remember my way home nonchalantly. she kept on checking me out and was making weird faces and i was thinking that she probably thought i was just fooling around and not taking it seriously. but really, i had everything worked out in my head.. then we went home.

while we we're outside our place, both her and Mark were smoking.. she probably can't take it anymore and asked me if i can go home without their help now. i said, "yeah, pretty much.." she kept on asking if i really can and i kept on saying that i really can. then she asked me how can i, if i remember any landmarks which can tell me if i'm going the right way home. i said: "yeah, i remember a billboard and that tells me i have to go right.." she looked at me with disbelief written all over her face and then she asked: "what if the billboard was taken down?" i was like: "hell, i didn't think of that.."

the good thing was that the entire time that i wasn't familiar with Doha that billboard wasn't taken down.. the poster was changed a couple of times but the billboard wasn't removed. now that i think about it, my answer was pretty dumb. i don't know what i was thinking. but really it was quite hilarious.

♥ Digicam? hmmm...

i was looking through some of my friends facebook account when i saw some cool photos which they took. it made me so envious that i started taking pictures using my camera phone. i was rather irritated though that i wasn't able to take photos which satisfies me so it made me think that maybe i should buy a digicam. i might benefit from buying one so i probably should. i do like taking pictures of scenery and stuff, though i have to admit that i don't take photos of myself that much. hmmm.. it probably is a good idea so i'll canvas first and try some cameras before buying one.. yeah, i should do that, maybe my creative drive will kick again.

♥ Hopeless Feelings

this might be weird but the guy that i'm inlove with, i'm not really looking forward in seeing him after so many years. it's just that i don't have enough confidence to see him face to face especially now that he has someone else. i mean i already know that this feelings i have for him are bleak but i don't want it to smack me in the face and know for a fact it is d*mn HOPELESS. i know that it's unfair that i'm kinda like blaiming him for not returning my feelings back but i think that since i already acknowledge what i truly felt for him, it's my responsibility to keep it contained. i don't want him to feel guilty so i guess i have to avoid him and not to talk to him as much as possible.

on a lighter note, i had my picture edited. i like how it turned out. here it is..